This Week's Letter comes to us from Hart Johnson of Keweenaw, Michigan. Hart Writes:
Dr. Mr. Phillips,
Are you interested in being an online sugar daddy, whereby you sent me money to support the lifestyle of a relatively successful writer, and I will can you Pooh-bear and daddio and talk about how generous you are?
See, I can't do the real thing, because HWMNBMOTI would take issue, but probably he'd be okay if it was only in writing. I'd be willing to cease and desist posting naked man butts as of the arrival of the first (large) check...
Can't Hurt to Ask
I would love to be someone's sugar daddy. However, if it's online, I'm technically only getting <10% of the experience, and therefore, you would also only get that much back. So instead of a hundred dollars I would send you two scratch tickets and the Baltic Avenue I got from the McDonald's Monopoly game. Also instead of a fur coat you would only get a fur from a squirrel my dog killed. It really doesn't seem cost efficient in my opinion. But if you still like the idea, email me your address and I'll start mailing your "perks" right away.
Chris "Sugar Daddio" Phillips