Monday, December 20, 2010

Christmas Post of the Ages!

Today's post is part of the Be Jolly By Golly blogfesting marathon!  If you haven't signed up you should do so.  The winner for best blogfest post gets a year supply of candy canes (which is like 3 of them because after you break into one you realize that candy canes aren't that good, or at least aren't good enough to eat one twice the size and length as a pencil, so you don't eat the other two and as you eat the first one you kind of realize it's stale and probably all of them are left over from what you didn't eat last year, or was it the year before?)

Anywho, here are the rules and regulations of said blogfest:
1.Blog Post to be posted on December 20th (whatever time you desire)
2.Show pictures of your decorations, holiday lights & Christmas tree!
3.Share your favorite treat (Recipe included, chance for others to steal the yumminess!)
4.Share your favorite drink (Recipe included, chance for others to steal the alcohol – or non)
5.Last but not least… visit others!!! Take part in their holiday cheer!

Note: For those who don’t celebrate Christmas, you’re welcome to share any other holiday you are celebrating in this year!

Decorations:

We have a fake tree.  I've always had a fake tree.  Always will.  Why you ask?  Because people who cut their own tree are murderers!  Okay not really.  But they do it as a tradition and you can never get out of traditions.  If no one is coming over to my house before Christmas I want the option to not put the blasted thing together, even if in the end I always do.  When you're a tree cutter there is no option.  You just have to do it.  


The wife also puts out a wreath.  She seems to love it.  I always hated those things because you have to be more gentle opening the door or the wreath could fall or need adjusting.  Our screen door is 90 pounds of hydraulic death so I don't like the extra effort to both not die before entering my house and keep the wreath in place.

 
Even though I may sound very Scrooge-like I do also decorate.  Here is a picture of a Santa Alf I won in a crane machine.  

I made him a sleigh out of a shoe box and used to line him up in my classroom with reindeer that I also won in a crane machine.  I amaze myself at what decorations are a hassle and which ones I hassle myself with.  

I also decorate my pup!  Since she's never actually said she hates it I just assume she doesn't!



Treat:
Okay, so you know those cherry mash thingies you can find in the candy aisle?  And you think to yourself, "cherry crap coated in chocolate?!?  Oh, yes!  Let's!"  


And then it's pretty stale (more so than the candy cane) and the chocolate tastes like it has been coating a work boot.  So then you start to think to yourself, "Self, if cherry crap coated in chocolate can taste bad, maybe there is no Santa, no Easter Bunny.  Maybe nothing is real.  Maybe I'm trapped in the matrix!"  
Well fret no longer!  Here is a recipe for homemade ones that are the exact opposite.  It is basically a ball of cherry cocaine covered in chocolate.  The melting of the wax makes it difficult, but holy craps they are well worth it.  I try to con my mother into making them whenever I can so I don't have to do it.  I stick them in the freezer and get them partly frozen so I can suck on them and savor the taste longer.  Otherwise it slightly resembles Garfield eating lasagna.  

Here it goes:
CHERRY MASH CANDY
2 boxes white frosting mix
1/2 tsp. cheery candy flavoring
2 lb. powdered sugar
1 can Eagle Brand
1 (10 oz.) jar maraschino cherries, drained and chopped
1 tsp. vanilla
1/2 stick butter, melted
2 (12 oz.) pkg. chocolate chips
2 oz. paraffin
1 lb. chopped salted nuts
Melt butter, add sugar, cherries, milk, vanilla; mix well. Roll into small balls then freeze on cookie sheet. Melt in double boiler chips, nuts, and paraffin dip balls into melted mixture with toothpicks.

Alcohol:  

There are only 2 holiday drinks I know w/ alcohol.  In my family you could almost argue beer (Old Milwaukee) is a holiday drink, but that really only applies to us.  The first is Eggnog, which is a shame to muddy the deliciousness of eggnog with alcohol.  Also to properly get into the holiday spirit with eggnog you either have to make it taste truly terrible or chug enough nog to deck the halls on the way to your bathroom all night.  Really there is only one good option here.  Hot cocoa with peppermint schnapps.   Get some higher quality cocoa so the schnapps makes it taste like an Andes mint instead of a candy cane.  Again you run into the problem of alcohol to fluid volume, but you can always sneak sips of straight schnapps intermittently and then wash it down with Andes mint flavored cocoa.  If you've ever wondered why Uncle Mort seemed sauced, but still smelled like candy canes it's because he was an avid reader of my blog.

Anyway that's how I roll up in this Holiday Seazizzle. 

Season's Greetings!


62 comments:

  1. Wow, I've never heard of Cherry Mash. Thanks for sharing the recipe. I'll have to try it some day. The pup looks so festive too! Merry Christmas!

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  2. You should win for best humor, especially the 90 pounds of door death.

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  3. No you do not have K-State Snuggies!!! Love the picture of your pup and of course you have a Santa Alf! Great pics!

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  4. Good stuff! Who doesn't love dog antlers?

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  5. LOL, I agree with Alex, best humor award! Love the dog pic but he probably considers that his present to you :)

    Happy Holidays!
    Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow

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  6. LOL! Love the killer door and the most adorable pup in her holiday best. I've never heard or seen Cherry Mash, but I may just have to try out that recipe. Merry Christmas!

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  7. The dog is the big winner here - who needs to decorate a tree when the mutt is willing and able to encapsulate Christmas. ;)
    Have a great holiday - Merry Christmas.

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  8. Loved your post - so funny! Cherry Mash sounds great. :)

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  9. Your doggy dressed up is the BEST!!!!! And the elf comes a very close second. Nope, the doggy wins hands down!!!

    I love your last pic!!! The look on your doggy's face is just priceless! LOL! Take care
    x

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  10. Great post! Too true about the candy canes. They make great present decorations, though, so that's a good way to get rid of the rest of the box!

    Your dog is so cute. Her expression just says... "Um... what?"

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  11. Happy Christmas!

    I love your dog - so cute! I've never heard of Cherry Mash, so I've added to my to try list for this festive season.

    Be Jolly By Golly

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  12. Very funny post! I love the family picture. Merry Christmas to you and yours.

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  13. Awww! Doggy looks so cute. My dog *has* told me she hates it. Hasn't stopped me from doing it, though.

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  14. Great post! We have a wreath too, but manage to sidestep the door-of-death problem by having a double door at the front, so the wreath goes on the side we don't use. And I'm loving the ingenious ways people have found to introduce alcohol into otherwise innocuous recipes.

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  15. Love the snuggies and your dog looks festively adorable!
    We always have a fake tree as well. Easier to manage and you always have it!
    Merry Christmas to you and your wife, Chris!

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  16. I had never heard of Cherry Mash either. Thank you so much for the recipe. Looks like the pup enjoys partaking of the festivities.

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  17. Awww, your dog is adorable all dressed up for the holidays. The peppermint schnapps in the hot chocolate sounds yummy. I'm going to have to try it this year.

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  18. Thank God, I'm not the only one who dressed up their dog. Actually, mine wouldn't cooperate so I had to steal my Mom's pup since he's easy to wrestle.

    The snuggies are a perfect touch!!

    Hope you guys have a very Merry Christmas!

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  19. Santa Alf!! Sweetly adorable, in its Alfy little way. We use fresh trees, because they SMELL so wonderful--a perk a fake tree doesn't have. But then, fake trees don't have needles to shed all over the carpet. ;o) Merry Christmas!

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  20. I love you put up a picture of your dog all dressed up (at least I'm not alone!). Have a great Christmas!

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  21. Your advice on candy canes = so true. But I can't seem to quit them! Have a merry (White?) Christmas in Nebraska :)

    ~ Bess

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  22. I LOVE this post--my favorite so far!! I'm not even sure which is my favorite part--the wreath (LOVE the stenciling on your wall by the door) or your cherry mash recipe or the drink or the Alf or the snuggies.... :-)

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  23. I laughed out loud all the way through this post. I'm still laughing. I may bookmark it amd make people read it when they visit.

    A very Merry Christmas to you and yours!

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  24. #1 - Your dog is the cutest thing ever! I wish my dogs would let me put fun hat things on their heads! #2 - Your tree and wreath are beautiful! And lastly, #3 - I LOVE the painting on the wall behind your front door. So pretty!

    Merry Christmas!

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  25. What a FUN post! I love homemade cherry mash things! And your wife's wreath is beautiful!

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  26. Snuggies=awesome. Dog dressed as reindeer=awesome. Cherry+chocolate=awesome. Hot Chocolate I can get drunk off of=awesome. Well...according to my calculations, Christmas at your house is awesome.

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  27. This was hilarious! And I am amazed at how many things you managed to win out of the crane machine...that could be considered a Christmas miracle, in my opinion.
    Merry Christmas!

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  28. Chris - Your dog is The CUTEST!!! ROFL. Merry Christmas.

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  29. I'm cracking up. Loved this and your dog so cute. In answer to your question about the gluhwein--oh yeah sugar cube and rum then light it on fire. Soooo good. I have not found the special mugs they use there though.
    Have a wonderful holiday!

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  30. Ha ha! Still laughing about this: "Our screen door is 90 pounds of hydraulic death so I don't like the extra effort to both not die before entering my house and keep the wreath in place."

    And your dog must love being dressed up like that. I mean, who wouldn't? It's very classy. I'm a new follower. Love your style. That TV in the background looks EXACTLY like one my parents had when I was wee.

    Merry Christmas!

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  31. Your pup looks so festive! And I give you props for winning anything out of the crane machines!

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  32. I posted to the wrong post, so you might want to check the one before this one. I'm blond, it happens : )

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  33. I love that wreath!! It's fab! And thanks for the reminder - I must get some antlers for my dog! :) Happy Christmas to you!

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  34. You seriously look like you're having fun in that last photo. And thanks for the official forgiveness.
    beth-project52.blogspot.com

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  35. OK, you crack me up, your background is awesome and you're not afraid to put a picture of yourself wearing a purple snuggie (go K-state) on the internet. I'll be back...

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  36. I'm so going for those cherry mash thingies. Oh, and I decorate my cat with Christmas collars.

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  37. haha! Your writing cracks me up. That cherry chocolate recipe looks incredible! I may have to make that really soon!

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  38. OMG I forgot all about Alf even existing! Love him as santa.

    And your puppy is GREAT!!!

    Also, I'm SO going to try your cherry crap ; P

    MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

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  39. Love your Be Jolly By Golly post - it's full of awesomeness. Your dog is quite a cutie!

    Merry Christmas!

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  40. I've never had a real tree either. The cherry treat sounds so sweet but so yum.

    Merry Christmas
    Lyn
    W.I.P. It: A Writer's Journey

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  41. Thanks for visiting my blog and following! It's so weird that your initials are the same as my dad's, Clifford Lyle Pritchett. LOL

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  42. Stopping by for the blogfest...

    I love love love the dog picture! Awesomeness! If only I could do that to the cats....

    Have a great holiday!

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  43. I was jazzing on all your decorations...all the way up until I saw your snuggies. YAK. I can't stand those things!!

    Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! :)

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  44. Your dog is just too adorable all dressed up! and your wife's wreath is gorgeous! Happy Holidays!
    ~Kelley

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  45. At first I was terrified by the Christmas Alf (seriously, am I the only one who thought he looked scary?) and then I saw the Snuggies...

    Your doggie made me Squeee though! OMG he's so cute. Especially all dressed up!

    Merry Christmas!

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  46. This is by far the funniest Jolly Golly post I've read today! So fun! And the snuggies...hilarious. Your dog is adorable! Happy Holidays to you!

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  47. Santa Alf! You totally win for best holiday decoration!!

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  48. Your dog is so cute! The Cherry Mash recipe sounds interesting. I think I'll have to give that one a try.

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  49. Ha ha Christmas Alf!! Your doggy is precious. And the recipe looks amazing, though I'm not sure I'm skilled enough to pull it off...

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  50. Alas I do the menorah thing, but I can't wait to see who tops the purple pair of PJs.

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  51. So many things...hmmmm, where to begin. Pup is festive cuteness and very tolerant. I'm pretty sure she's rolling her eyes.
    Holiday Alf is righteous...I only wish I could see your crafty shoebox sleigh.

    BUT the piece de resistance, the star on top of it all...the matching Snuggies. Whoa Nellie.

    Oh, and I've never heard of cherry mash before. The store version looks vile, but the recipe sounds yum.

    Merry Christmas!
    ~Lola

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  52. I like the fact that even though you grinch about it, you still put in the effort at school and at home.

    Listen, do you really think I enjoy spending a week to decorate my condo. The pressures is so on me for perfection because I am an interior designer, and my clients/friends expect perfection from me. Even when I do nothing, it's something. SO i give a lots of credit!

    Your dog is too cute!

    Happy Christmas and all the best in the new year, Chris for you and your family.


    Michael

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  53. That Santa Alf is hilarious! I wish The Hubster would at least let me dress up our dog! But he won't. Yours is adorable. And such a good dog for being patient. Have a Merry Christmas!

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  54. You remind me of my father. All ho humming and bah humbugging about the holidays and then he decorates something. Let's say a dog (so cute btw). But deep inside it's his favorite time of the year. I hope it doesn't cause you too much stress celebrating the season. I snorted several times reading your post. Thanks for sharing and Merry Christmas!

    Now go put another coal on the fire. :D

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  55. Cherry mash is officially the best thing ever!! Seriously! Where has it been all my life!!!

    I LOVE your dog. I tried to wrap my cat up but she got angry. Really angry (and scratched my mom cause she loves me too much. Haha).

    My tree is fake too. But that's cause I'm allergic.

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  56. The candy mash sounds wonderful. Love your decorated dog by the way.

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  57. I love your tree- I like those thin sophisticated looking ones. Love your snuggies!

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